Repeat after me: “It’s not about me.”
Most of us know that, but in the stresses of everyday life, it can be easy for us to act as if we really think otherwise. When I’m feeling rushed and like my to-do list is about to overwhelm me, the people around me never move fast enough. I get fed up and can be anything but patient and kind.
The best solution to this is to simplify our lives; when we are calmer, it’s much easier to be the loving people we aspire to be. But as a working mom who juggles side projects, I understand that achieving that simplicity can be a challenge. So we need to make “It’s not about me” our mantra, and we need to make looking out for others a habit.
In a hurry? (When am I not?) Take a deep breath and resist snapping at someone who is slowing you down. Let someone ahead of you in line. Take time to listen, even when you have no time. (Yes, these are all easier said than done. I’m not good at them, but I believe that these practices can make me a better person and that they will not, in the end, significantly affect how much I get done or how quickly I get to the next place I’m going.)
Annoyed by that driver who cut you off or who is tailgating or [fill in your pet peeve here]? Do not — I repeat — do not give them a one-finger salute or let their driving affect your own. Let it go. They’re probably just as stressed as you are. Maybe, just maybe, your considerate driving will catch on… if not with them, then with other drivers around you.
Sort of want to go to that party but not sure if you’ll feel like it on the actual day of the event? As an introvert, I understand… but as someone who has hosted gatherings, I know how frustrating it can be when you can’t get a remotely accurate guest count. Be the person who makes a commitment and — barring an emergency — sticks to it.
Practice the little things: holding a door open, putting the divider down after you put your groceries on the conveyor belt, smiling instead of scowling. Say a little prayer of blessing for the people around you, or a prayer of thanks for the good things in your life.
None of this means that your life doesn’t matter. On the contrary, it means that how you act can make a real difference in the lives of those around you, that you have the power to alter the course of someone’s day.
Life is not about me… it’s about love.
Let’s practice that together.